Guy walks into work one morning and finds a colleague laughing really hard at his desk. "what’s up" he asks his mate. "well, this morning I made a Freudian slip" "what the hell is one of those" he asks.
"It’s when you say what is on your mind, rather than what you mean, so, I was at the train station, and the lady serving tickets had incredibly large breasts, and instead of asking for a ticket to Tooting (station in London), I asked for a ticket to titting!"
They both laugh and get on with their work.
the next day, the other guy comes in to find his mate pissing himself with laughter at his desk. "What’s so funny" he asks. "I made one of your Freudian slips this morning" he says. "My missus asked me what I wanted for breakfast this morning, and instead of saying bacon and eggs, I said "fuck off you fat ugly bitch, you’ve ruined my life!"