Tao dude, I wish I had it so easy. Y’see, I too was a user- I had the flange, the modulators, envelope filters, the whole thing… I thought I was ridin’ high, flickin’ the fish, slappin’ the beef, but it got too much for me. One by one, all my fellow fuzz addicts started to fall away… some died, some went mad or blind, and some even started listening to Leonard Cohen. LEONARD COHEN, man, that was a tough time. I didn’t get the easy way out, though, oh no. See we don’t have none of that advance medical technology here in Dingle town, no sir. They just locked me in a room and told me to get on with it. I had the full shit, man- the burning in the ears, continuous mental feedback swirling in my wah-wah glands… then one day it just stopped. It didn’t leave me, I still knew the fuzz was there for me but I had control of it. I had an epiphany concerning a snail and a small pot of jam… long stry, very sticky.
I just hope peopel such as ourselves can serve as an example to the fuzz-using youth of today. You have the technology, now you must learn how to use it. Stay in school. Stay cool like the cool man says.