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Lisa: "You can’t post that on the internet, you don’t even know if it’s TRUE!!!"

Homer: "I hear they got the internet on computers now."

Homer: "I gotta joke about how white people are different from black people. Ya see….white people are named Lenny, and black people are named Carl!!! HAHA HAHA HAHA"

Burns: "He [Smithers] doesn’t know the MEANING of the word "gay"."

Ralph: "I found a moonrock in my nose!!"

Marge: "I’m a lucky woman."
Homer: "And i’m a wonderful man."

Poochie: "Wiggly Wiggly!!"

Bart: "Awww…I gotta moustache comb. What’d you get Lis."
Lisa: "A fake moustache. Wanna comb it??"

Nurse: "Doctor, you’ve gotta call from the coroner."
Dr. Nick: "Awwww….not THAT guy again!!!"

Cletus’ girlfriend (while she and Cletus are making out in the back of the truck): "Cletus, how come you had to park so close to my parents!!!"
Cletus: "Awwww…their my parents too!!!"

Homer: "I’ve never been a praying man, but if your up there, please SAVE me SUPERMAN!!!"

Homer: "A gun is not a weapon…it’s a tool. Like a butcher knife, a harpoon….or an alligator."

Homer: "I can’t be a missionary…..I don’t even believe in JEBUS!!! SAAAAAAAVE ME JEEEEEBUSSSSSS!!!!"